I've just tell the truth to her, my bestie. Em idk why too hard for her to explain why she changed. I let myself to be really honest to her. I talk all the truth. What I feel before this, all. All. But why cant she tell me the truth? It it too hard for her. Whats really my mistake? What did I already do to her untill she dont want to tell me the truth. Secret. Forever secret she said. I cannot. My life wouldnt be peace if she dont tell the truth.
I cry as fast as the river. I dont understand my feeling. What the fcking hell had happen to me? Because of my bestie I can cry like this. I dont know why I really really love her to be my friend. Since first we closed. I dont want to lose her.
She've been changed this year. We got different class. She have her own friend and so me. But I dont really close to my classmate. But she.... close like em. I dont how to explain. She cant feel what I feel. About 3 month above we're not close like dulu dulu anymore. She've been changed. Wherever she go, she always with her classmate/deskmate. I just.... emmm. I cannot do anything. She have her own life and so me. I dont want to bothered her. So I try to stay away from her. But I cant. After a year we've been really closed nak mampoz I cant easily forget her and find new bestfriend. Because only her can accept me, only her know how to handle me, only her know how to chill me, only her. But I know, I'm just busygirl in her life. I'm just.........
I dont know why I really love her to be my friend. Yea, theres many more friend outside there. But you know, 'kawan memang ramai nak mampoz, tapi sahabat sorang dua ja' Understand what I mean right? Conceal dont fell dont let them know. I cant let anyone to replace her. I cant find any of them.
Sorry because I'm too demanded. I'm not sesuai to be ur bff. How I wish u could understand what I feel one day. May Allah bless u, my dear bff. If one day u read diz, I want u to know that I really really really fcking love to be ur friends and I dont even want to lose u. Thats all. Lots of love and some tears from me dear, night.
